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home : columns : dear harriette March 23, 2017

Friends involve reader in marriage problems

Thursday, March 23, 2017

Anderson Jewelers

Reader needs tips to stop procrastinating
Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Daughter using emergency credit card for fun
Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Woman's masculine style greeted with derision
Monday, March 20, 2017

Gift of books should come from the heart
Saturday, March 18, 2017

Reader makes up mind about makeup
Friday, March 17, 2017

Going to concert isn't a political statement
Thursday, March 16, 2017

Friend's social media obsession out of hand
Wednesday, March 15, 2017

Politics gets in the way of friendship
Tuesday, March 14, 2017

Friend's use of slur shocks reader
Monday, March 13, 2017

Reporting animal abuse is always correct
DEAR HARRIETTE: I live near a farm and find the state that those animals are in despicable. This is a petting zoo that gives tours to families, and the animals are kept in cramped cages and can barely move. I think this is animal abuse and believe this farm should be shut down. Should I call the police to report this neighborhood farm? I don't think children should be taught about nature like this. -- Animal Abuse, Norfolk, Virginia 
Saturday, March 11, 2017

Juggling two beaus is a bad idea
DEAR HARRIETTE: I am caught in a love triangle. I'm 22 and feel completely unsure of what to do. "Luke" is a sweet guy, and we've been friends for years, while "Chris" is a jock who has just started showing me attention. I feel horrible for juggling two guys, but only because it would hurt Luke if he found out. I know I will eventually have to choose one, but am completely torn on where to focus my energy. Should I pick the reliable choice or the daring bad boy? -- Too Much Love, Cincinnati 
Friday, March 10, 2017

Wife's secret bankroll troubles reader
DEAR HARRIETTE: My wife has recently purchased a car for herself. I had no idea she even had the funds to do something like this. She gave her old car to our daughter to take to college and refuses to answer any of my questions about her personal finances. 
Thursday, March 9, 2017

Food for restricted diet disappears too quickly
Wednesday, March 8, 2017

Neighbors obsess over sprinkler systems
Tuesday, March 7, 2017

Friend wants to bleach that man right outta her hair
Monday, March 6, 2017

Reader isn't ready for wedding bells
Saturday, March 4, 2017

Husband interjects in fight between friends
Friday, March 3, 2017

Sharing memories can shift focus from hardship
Thursday, March 2, 2017

Fake accent is hurtful, not cute
Wednesday, March 1, 2017

Bride wants to avoid drunken mayhem at reception
Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Teacher feels useless without glasses
Monday, February 27, 2017

Scorned reader shouldn't sabotage former date
DEAR HARRIETTE: I went on a few dates with someone, but he never responded to my messages. You can imagine my shock when I saw him interviewing for a position at my company. I was asked my opinion on him, and I gave him a negative review because of how he treated me. Upon reflection, I possibly sabotaged him because of a situation outside of work. Should I change my tune on him, considering he is truly qualified for the job? I wouldn't want karma to come back around and bite me like it could him. -- Mincing Words, Boston 
Friday, February 24, 2017

Reader questions fashion decisions at work
DEAR HARRIETTE: I try to stay up-to-date on the newest fashion and beauty trends. I have tried extending my look into the workplace, a local coffee shop, and have gotten compliments from customers. My boss, who is old enough to be my father, constantly gives me an eye roll whenever I come in with a new piercing or hair color. I wear my uniform and maintain a well-kempt appearance. Should I tone down my style just because my boss doesn't like how I present myself? I cannot lose this job. -- Beauty vs. Bills, Syracuse, New York 
Friday, February 24, 2017

Topical pain relievers can be quite effective
Thursday, February 23, 2017

Reader makes changes to age-old recipes
Thursday, February 23, 2017

Reader doesn't know what to do with ex's present
Wednesday, February 22, 2017

After election, reader is ready to get involved
Tuesday, February 21, 2017

Friend ignores reader for months at a time
Monday, February 20, 2017

Teenager needs to learn definition of "emergency"
Saturday, February 18, 2017

Sorority taking too much of reader's time
Friday, February 17, 2017

Reader wants to starting asking for help
Thursday, February 16, 2017

Twins insist on wearing full face of makeup
Wednesday, February 15, 2017

Neighbors' escalating fights worry reader
Tuesday, February 14, 2017

World Almanac
Today is the 44th day of 2017 and the 55th day of winter. 
Monday, February 13, 2017

Boyfriend's tantrums cost more than money
Monday, February 13, 2017

Aunt wants to give niece unsolicited skin tips
DEAR HARRIETTE: I am very invested in skin care, and am currently curating the perfect anti-aging routine. I have noticed that my teenage niece, "Shannon," has cystic acne. She covers it up with makeup and constantly touches her face and picks at it. I was a teenager once, and I battled acne into my 20s. Could I give her my unsolicited advice? I know simple fixes that could do wonders for her skin, but I don't want to be seen as the nosy aunt. -- Clear Skin Awaits, Tupelo, Mississippi 
Saturday, February 11, 2017

Volunteering for charity should not require money
Thursday, February 9, 2017

Reader doesn't need to break the bank on fashion
Wednesday, February 8, 2017

Reader ready to snap out of rut
Tuesday, February 7, 2017

Teen daughter's drinking worries reader
Monday, February 6, 2017

Reader ready to move out of parents' house
Saturday, February 4, 2017

Reader unsure how to respond to mean girl
Friday, February 3, 2017

Reader disturbed seeing deceased on social media
Thursday, February 2, 2017

Roommate makes decision without consulting reader
Wednesday, February 1, 2017

Reader does not want to provide nutrition advice
Tuesday, January 31, 2017

Reader should feel free to challenge elder
Monday, January 30, 2017

Reader shaken up by accident in mom's car
 DEAR HARRIETTE: While driving my mother's car to pick up my sister from the train station, I slid on black ice and hit the car in front of me. There was no way to avoid the incident, and I was shaken up. The other car was not damaged. When I came home, my mother did not ask if I was OK. She just cried about how she's going to get to work while the bumper gets repaired. This bothered me because she could've gone to pick up my sister and experienced the same situation. Insurance is covering the cost of repair. Should I offer to pay the deductible? -- Crashing, Roanoke, Virginia
Saturday, January 28, 2017

Mother changes personality in new marriage
Friday, January 27, 2017

Allergic baby sitter needs medication
Thursday, January 26, 2017

Keep kids cell-free while on the road
Wednesday, January 25, 2017

British co-worker's humor goes too far
DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my co-workers is from the U.K. "Grant" is well-liked, but he can occasionally go too far with his jokes. Whenever others bristle at his humor, Grant huffs and claims that American humor is just not as developed as his British humor. While this may be true and open to interpretation, there is no denying he offends whoever ends up as the butt of the joke. Should there be more pressure on Grant to apologize, or does he get a pass because we apparently can't understand his sense of humor? -- Cross-Atlantic Comedy, Raleigh, North Carolina
Tuesday, January 24, 2017

New friend's accent raises questions
DEAR HARRIETTE: A woman was introduced to my circle at our club. She seemed great and spoke about how her worldview had changed since marrying a Spaniard. I asked where she was from, and she told me she was born and raised in Connecticut. I nearly laughed out loud -- she speaks with a fake Spanish accent!
Monday, January 23, 2017

Reader doesn't know what to do about smelly shoes
Saturday, January 21, 2017

Reader wants to pursue restaurant dream
Friday, January 20, 2017

Neighbor ignores cat-sitting duties
Thursday, January 19, 2017

Friends drop the ball on new year's eve party
Wednesday, January 18, 2017

Stepfather wants more information
Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Stepdaughter must clean up her own mess
Monday, January 16, 2017

Reader doesn't want unexpected present
DEAR HARRIETTE: I hate being surprised with presents. This Christmas, I received a pair of goggles (I ski) that I hate. They are bright pink and offer no UV protection. The gift didn't come with a gift receipt, just the spoken wish that I would wear them. What do I do with these goggles now? I would feel so wasteful throwing them out, but I do not need another pair, especially ones that don't protect my eyes and skin. -- Unhappy Skier, Westchester, New York
Saturday, January 14, 2017

Reader's office holiday party gets out of hand
Friday, January 13, 2017

Reader grumbles about rumbling stomach
Thursday, January 12, 2017

Reader questions what to do with presents
Wednesday, January 11, 2017

Reader overwhelmed by birthday outpouring
Tuesday, January 10, 2017

Dresser comes with strings attached
Monday, January 9, 2017

Sister's past influences reader's future
Saturday, January 7, 2017

Reader embarrassed by sweaty palms
Friday, January 6, 2017

Go ahead and tell acquaintance about food in teeth
Thursday, January 5, 2017

Fledgling musician son annoys family
Wednesday, January 4, 2017

Reader doesn't want to engage trolling friend
DEAR HARRIETTE: Someone who runs in a similar social circle as me is a nuisance on social media. He is a self-proclaimed "troll," and he adds inappropriate or lewd comments on posts. I blocked and unblocked him (so it seems like he never followed me in the first place), but he has privately messaged me, asking why I won't let him follow me. How can I tell him that he makes people uncomfortable on social media? He genuinely thinks he's hilarious. -- Not My Follower, Philadelphia
Tuesday, January 3, 2017

Harriette suggests planning for success in 2017
Monday, January 2, 2017

Reader tired of Christmas gifts
DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a high-maintenance person to buy gifts for. I am incredibly picky. Because of this, every year I ask for no presents for Christmas because I know I probably won't like them. Instead, I tell my family to buy another gift for their children or spouse. I am well-off and fortunate enough to buy myself the necessities. I tell the Christmas host, my sister, about my no-gift policy because she constantly goes overboard and then complains about being broke after the holidays. I never draw attention to the fact that I open one gift and always bring a gift for everyone else -- year after year. How can I finally make it clear to my sister to stop wasting her money on gifts I will never use? I'm already trying to plan for next year. -- It's Been Years, Wilmington, Delaware
Friday, December 30, 2016

Go ahead and plan your own birthday party
DEAR HARRIETTE: I love to plan my birthday celebrations. I feel like it is the one day a year I can completely make about me. This year, my girlfriend of almost a year was shocked to learn that I have been planning my own birthdays for all my adult life.
Thursday, December 29, 2016

Friends don't attend reader's performances
Wednesday, December 28, 2016

Reader ready to give up smoking for good
DEAR HARRIETTE: I am trying to kick my casual smoking habit. I never thought I would become a smoker -- I know how horrendous it is for the body. However, when I am outside the bar getting some fresh air and get offered a cigarette, I get excited and can't say no. I have tried refusing, but this typically falls on deaf ears. I want to kick this habit for good. What can I say to those who harmlessly offer me a cigarette? -- Deathly Habit, Cincinnati
Tuesday, December 27, 2016

Reader getting flak for calling off wedding
DEAR HARRIETTE: I called off my wedding with my fiance. I didn't tell anyone that he cheated on me for years because I want my family to still respect the father of my child. What I didn't expect was the backlash onto me. I was trying to help my daughter and myself but now my family thinks I've ruined my ex's life by calling off the wedding. I did what is best for my child and me, but I don't think my family will see this unless I tell them the truth. Is it wise to reveal this secret? -- All His Fault, Sag Harbor, New York
Monday, December 26, 2016

Trinity Dodge Fixed

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