3/8/2014 11:12:00 AM Woman trashes husband's attempt at breakfast
DEAR HARRIETTE: I love my husband. He is a wonderful man, but when it comes to his cooking, I would rather he not step in our kitchen ever again. Last Saturday, my husband took the initiative to make breakfast; he made pancakes, scrambled eggs and turkey sausages. His goal was to put a smile on my face. Sadly, I threw out the food he made because it was terrible. He was upset because I threw out the cooked food and made breakfast the right way. I think I could have handled the situation differently. -- Sacred Ground, Rochester, N.Y.
DEAR SACRED GROUND: You are tough. It would have been far nicer for you to thank your husband for trying and to eat what you could. You insulted him and surely hurt his feelings. Instead, encourage him to spend some time in the kitchen with you.
You can still thank him for his efforts and invite him to make a special meal with you. Teach him how to make eggs to your liking, or choose another dish. As a couple, you can have fun learning about anything. Attitude is everything! And you, dear one, need an attitude adjustment.
DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I started our family late. I had my first child when I was 34 years old, and I had my second child when I turned 39. I am 41 years old now, and I would like to have another child before it is not possible. My husband does not think it is a good idea because we are getting older and our busy schedules would not allow it. Should I respect my husband's wishes, or should I nag him until I get my third child? -- Happy Wife, Brooklyn, N.Y.
DEAR HAPPY WIFE: As far as age goes, you should have a checkup with your OB-GYN to see if you are healthy enough to have another child. Plenty of people have babies after 40. Yes, the risk for birth defects rises, but this should be evaluated specifically for you with your doctor.
As far as your finances and lifestyle go, sit down and map out a budget based on time and resources to see where you and your husband stand in your vision of the future. Talk about whether you believe you can comfortably "afford" to bring a third child into the world. Take the time to go through all of your hopes and dreams and fears -- from both of your perspectives. This is a decision you should make together, one that is not based on nagging or fear, but on conscious intention. Tell him that you would like to approach it in a respectful, mature way. Chances are, he will agree.
(Lifestylist and author Harriette Cole is president and creative director of Harriette Cole Media. You can send questions to firstname.lastname@example.org or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)