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home : columns : dear harriette February 25, 2021

12/28/2020 9:28:00 AM
Husband stashes gun in garage

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was digging through some storage in my garage and found a lockbox -- which wasn't even locked -- with a handgun inside. I immediately jumped to the conclusion that my husband has been hiding a gun in our garage. I did not know that he has one. It was pretty tucked away and wasn't easily accessible, but I can't imagine if I had sent my son to clean out the garage and he was the one who found it.

I am not sure if the gun is licensed, where it came from or how long he's had it. I am so angry about this, and I don't know how to approach it with him. I don't want a gun in our home, and I don't want to be caught in a situation where he is keeping an illegal gun. I'm thinking of just getting rid of it and saying nothing. But maybe I should find out if it's registered first? I'm kind of hoping it's not his because this is a huge issue in my book. I fear this conversation will not go my way. What's the right course of action here? -- Secret Weapon

DEAR SECRET WEAPON: You must speak to your husband first. Tell him that you found the gun. Ask him where it came from, if it's registered, etc. Ask him why he never told you that he has a gun. Express your feelings about having a gun in your home. You two have to talk this out. If he agrees to get rid of the gun, it should probably be surrendered to the police. You can't just throw away a gun.

If he refuses to dispose of the gun, require that he properly store it so that it cannot be a harm to your son or the family.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a new puppy that is about 5 months old, and my next-door neighbor just adopted an adult dog. Our fences are right next to each other. My neighbor keeps their dog outside most of the day, and he barks the whole time he is outside. I don't even remember what peace and quiet is like anymore because he barks so much.

I take my puppy outside for potty training and to play. I've noticed that my neighbor's dog will direct all his attention at my pup when we are outside. He has begun to dig at the fence and is making a dent that I know will soon turn into a hole. I am scared that one day he is going to get through and attack my small dog. I don't feel like I am safe in my own backyard. My neighbor's dog is damaging my fence. What are some solutions I can propose to my neighbor to solve these issues and my concerns? -- Neighboring Dogs

DEAR NEIGHBORING DOGS: It might be wise for the two of you to properly introduce your dogs face-to-face. They should become friends rather than adversaries, if that is possible. Talk to your neighbor about working together to establish a rapport between the two dogs. Also, point out that his dog is digging a hole under your fence, and you are concerned about that.

Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.

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