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home : columns : dear harriette April 18, 2021

1/27/2021 8:04:00 AM
New employee wants to quit job

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just started a new job about two months ago, but I hate it. I took it because I was out of work and a friend recommended it to me, but it's not what I imagined. My work-life balance is completely off. I work overnight; I am working my body in ways that are painful, like it's deteriorating day by day. I feel like I need to get out now to get my life and sense of mind back. But I really don't have a good enough reason to leave this job, and I am scared about what to say to my manager. I have never quit a job before without a plan. When I have resigned in the past, it was because I had a better job, but right now I have nothing. I can't just lie, either. How do I properly leave the job with no reason at all? -- Hate My Job

DEAR HATE MY JOB: I think you should slow down and do nothing for a moment. I'm sorry that you do not like your job. But I want to say that we don't always love our work or the circumstances that we find ourselves in. Especially now, during this pandemic, it might be wise to reconsider how you look at your job. Can you approach it differently so that you can make it work? It sounds like you have had to make a lot of adjustments, especially regarding time. Two months may not be long enough to establish a rhythm for your body that works. Examine your situation very carefully before giving up. If the time truly doesn't work, do you think you could request a shift change? Would it be better if you worked during the day? Don't give up until you consider all the options.

Finally, if you truly cannot stay, make a plan and start looking for a new job. It would be best to walk toward another job than to be unemployed again, if you can manage to stay short-term.

DEAR HARRIETTE: A young lady I do not know reached out to me, based on a referral from a friend of mine, asking if I would donate to her college fund campaign. I empathize with her, but I can't afford to contribute to her right now. Honestly, I do not appreciate that my friend made this referral without asking me first. I have been struggling to put food on the table and keep my kids in school. I am a generous person, but I simply cannot afford to fund this girl. I don't like being put in this awkward position either. I want to tell my friend. Should I? -- Awkward Position

DEAR AWKWARD POSITION: So many people are suffering now and unable to fulfill their dreams, at least at this moment. It doesn't help when friends to not keep this in mind when they ask for favors. You should speak to your friend and tell them how uncomfortable this makes you. Explain that you wish you could help, but you truly cannot right now. Suggest to your friend that they check in with potential donors before connecting people. This will save everyone unnecessary discomfort and potential rejection.

Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.





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